Is there room in the Para/Crypto/Fortean world for a gun-toting, paranoid, bipolar, opinionated bastard? A lonely romantic in search of his lost soul? A knight, Samurai, gunslinger, born in the wrong century? A self-destructive, doom-driven survivor seeking redemption? A heavy drinking gonzo outlaw cryptozoologist whose ego is exceeded only by his libido?
No, there isn't. That's why I'm here...

22 June 2008

Random Cinematic Monster Hunter Salute: Phantasm

Back in the 80's, even before I'd ever heard of Burt Gummer, I remember staying up late one night to watch Phantasm. What really impressed me about the movie was the fact that Mike, Reggie, and Jody had what we call "some sense".
Unlike the helpless, screaming, running, panicking victims so prevalent in monster/horror movies, these were the first guys I recall seeing who actually fought back. And they did it with STYLE.
When Mike went to investigate the mausoleum the first time, I remember saying to myself, "There's no way I'd go in there without a flashlight and a Colt .45!" (I'm serious, I REALLY did say this to myself!) After his escape, Mike is found by his brother Jody asleep on the stairs, propping on a .12 gauge riot gun. (STYLE!) After telling Jody about his experience, the brothers return, this time carrying (yep, you got it!) a flashlight and a Colt .45. (STYLE!)
As the brothers are joined by their friend Reggie, they do battle with the Tall Man and his gang of dwarves. In one scene, Jody "skeet shoots" one of the Tall Man's deadly silver spheres. (STYLE!)
They also have a cool car chase with the Tall Man's hearse pursuing the guys in their Hemi 'Cuda. (STYLE!)
As the series continued through the sequels, our guys add to their arsenal. There's the obligatory flamethrower, a couple of magnum revolvers, and of course, the Improvised Quad-Barrelled Shotgun. (the coolest weapon I'd NEVER want to fire, but it did have a certain STYLE!).
In one of those odd quirks of life, if you update the Colt 1911, the shotgun, and the Hemi 'Cuda to a Glock 20, a Saiga-12gauge, and a Hemi Jeep Commander, you'd have, well, me.
Style is eternal, but somehow "MikeJodyReggiefan" doesn't have the same ring to it.

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