Is there room in the Para/Crypto/Fortean world for a gun-toting, paranoid, bipolar, opinionated bastard? A lonely romantic in search of his lost soul? A knight, Samurai, gunslinger, born in the wrong century? A self-destructive, doom-driven survivor seeking redemption? A heavy drinking gonzo outlaw cryptozoologist whose ego is exceeded only by his libido?
No, there isn't. That's why I'm here...

05 May 2010

Armageddon It?

Synchronicity is a wonderful thing, or maybe it's paranoia?
Astrophysicist, mathematician, and all-around supergenius Stephen Hawking ruffled a few feathers in the "Space Brothers" community when he cautioned against attempts to contact space-travelling alien species. The guy makes a good point. He brought up the historical precedents of cross-cultural contact. History is rife with examples of technologically, more advanced civilizations running roughshod over lesser developped indigenous peoples. If the aliens are advanced enough to develop interplanetery or interdimensional travel, or time travel for that matter, or whatever the hell means they use to get here from wherever or whenever the hell it is that they come from, it's highly doubtful they would have a caring, beneficent attitude towards us. There are three possible reactions:
A: They would embrace us as equals (great!)
2: They would treat us with complete disdain, beneath consideration as a species (not good!)
C: They would view us with open hostility (yikes!)

So, the odds aren't all that great that humans and Space Aliens would hold hands (or other extremeties) and sing "Kum-buy-yah".

Hawking's statement comes in the midst of a big time UFO flap in Australia. Why are the aliens interested in the land Down Under? The scenery? The beer? That way cool opera house?
OR, could it be that Australia has some of THE most restrictive weapons laws on the planet? Not just guns, but swords, knives, whirling-martial-art-sticks-of-death, are all restricted, or banned, or tightly regulated in the Land of Oz. The Aussies are no doubt a tough lot, don't get me wrong, but if I were an alien commander looking for an easily defended stronghold, with an almost completely disarmed population, plus a modern, industrial infrastructure, I'd be hard pressed to find a better location to start my invasion.
Oddly enough, the other day I caught one of my favorite movies on TV, "Dr. Strangelove". Are we on the brink of interplanetery warfare toe-to-toe with the Greyskis?
Check your ammo, sharpen you swords, keep your eyes on the skies, put your shoulder to the wheel, & your nose to the grindstone.
We won't go down without a fight! We must do everything in our power to prevent those damned grey-skinned, cattle-mutilatin' bastards from sapping and impurifying our precious planetery fluids!

3 comments:

Autumnforest said...

Oh Burt! You always crack me up! I was thinking about it and why isn't it possible that we're their offspring, their babies, their experiment? They could be proud parents just taking snapshots... If anything, we should play up our role and beg them for the car keys to their UFOs and then bring it home a little worse for wear...

Gummerfan said...

Even if that is the case, how do we know that "They"'d view us with any kind of familial affection? What if "They" decide we're just a genetic experiment that needs to be flushed?

Autumnforest said...

Knowing man, Burt, we'd probably get it done more expeditiously. They could just leave us to our own devices...we have plenty of them in our arsenal and a fixation on religious superiority...wouldn't take much.